That Change In the Air

Tuesday, SeChangeOfSeasonsptember 22rd, marked the first day of fall in the Northern Hemisphere this year. The first day of winter will be December 21st. In the Southern Hemisphere, the fall season will begin on March 20, 2015. Their winter began on June 21, 2014. Seasons change in different parts of the world on a variety of different dates, but we know for a fact that the brisk change in the air is coming. The seasons of our lives change in pretty much the same manner.

We’ve all heard the saying that individuals enter our lives for a reason, a season or a lifetime. One of two things will happen: you will be the student or you will be the teacher. You will either learn the lesson that life is offering or you will teach that lesson. Sometimes the lessons are good ones (i.e., you will encounter someone who teaches you a trade, will be a mentor, will help you start a business, etc.); sometimes they are bad ones (i.e., you’re cheated on, you’re stolen from, you’re misled, etc.). Regardless of the situation, understand that if you are to live, and if you are to thrive, you must play BOTH roles at some point.

I can’t think of one person, alive or dead, who volunteers to be the student in the hard lessons. No one wants to be cheated on. All the things that come along with being cheated on – the lies, the deceit, sometimes being subjected to the notion that somehow the discretion was your fault – can leave you devastated. I know of no one who wants to be on the receiving end of being friends with someone, only to find out that he or she was only out to steal from you, whether it be ideas, your man or woman, or your belongings. We all want to be recipients of the good stuff. Here’s the deal though: without lessons like this, you will never learn to be cautious, you will never learn the purpose of truly protecting your interests. You must learn the hard lessons in order to grow. You will never move into that season of true knowledge and mental maturity.

I’ve been the student in many situations, especially in the 19 years I was married. I was lied to, cheated on, used, abused, torn down, built up, and everything in between. It is now my turn to be the teacher. I won’t be a teacher in kind, because it’s outside of my nature to misuse people, but I believe that the lessons I learned are ones that will allow me to help other women cross from the side of being the victim to being the victor. I’ve lived through the season of what seemed to be endless heartache and pain. I’ve entered a season of joy. Ninety-nine percent of my days are filled with happiness and I believe that it is because of the unconditional joy I now experience. In that season of hell, my days were constantly thrown off by the actions of others. That’s no longer the case because I have learned that I control my actions and reactions.

Walk into the season of bliss. Learn from your lessons, whether good or bad. Be thankful for whatever bit of knowledge you obtain and use it to help others grow. Use it to be a bridge.


2 thoughts on “That Change In the Air

  1. Not to sidetrack the conversation. But, firstly I’m sorry that you had to go through this. Secondly I’m still finding it hard to comprehend how a strong and powerful woman like yourself encountered such experiences. Albeit, I also understand in a marriage or relationship we tend to put up with certain things, despite our nature. Alas, we’ve all learned something from your experience.

    Thanks for sharing; I, of all people know how hard it is for a Scorpio to share 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Thank you SO much for the compliment!

    Several people have asked me the same question. People are curious as to why I stayed so long. I’ve always answered that I would not have the testimony that I have if I had left one minute earlier. I would not be living proof that you can move on after devastation. I would not know my own strength. I would not be able to tell another woman, from the heart, that it is possible to move on and get her life back on track.

    It has been over a year since my divorce was final and I’ve struggled mentally and emotionally on an unbelievable level but I can tell you that I plan to tell the full story because there are too many woman who are ashamed or are of the belief that no one else has been there or understands. Stay tuned. Thanks again!


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